Agnes Grey | Page 4

the business in hand, she was apt to think that no one
could do it so well as herself: so that whenever I offered to assist her, I received such an
answer as--'No, love, you cannot indeed--there's nothing here you can do. Go and help
your sister, or get her to take a walk with you--tell her she must not sit so much, and stay
so constantly in the house as she does-- she may well look thin and dejected.'
'Mary, mamma says I'm to help you; or get you to take a walk with me; she says you may
well look thin and dejected, if you sit so constantly in the house.'
'Help me you cannot, Agnes; and I cannot go out with YOU--I have far too much to do.'
'Then let me help you.'
'You cannot, indeed, dear child. Go and practise your music, or play with the kitten.'
There was always plenty of sewing on hand; but I had not been taught to cut out a single
garment, and except plain hemming and seaming, there was little I could do, even in that
line; for they both asserted that it was far easier to do the work themselves than to prepare
it for me: and besides, they liked better to see me prosecuting my studies, or amusing
myself--it was time enough for me to sit bending over my work, like a grave matron,
when my favourite little pussy was become a steady old cat. Under such circumstances,
although I was not many degrees more useful than the kitten, my idleness was not
entirely without excuse.
Through all our troubles, I never but once heard my mother complain of our want of
money. As summer was coming on she observed to Mary and me, 'What a desirable thing
it would be for your papa to spend a few weeks at a watering-place. I am convinced the
sea-air and the change of scene would be of incalculable service to him. But then, you see,
there's no money,' she added, with a sigh. We both wished exceedingly that the thing
might be done, and lamented greatly that it could not. 'Well, well!' said she, 'it's no use
complaining. Possibly something might be done to further the project after all. Mary, you
are a beautiful drawer. What do you say to doing a few more pictures in your best style,
and getting them framed, with the water-coloured drawings you have already done, and
trying to dispose of them to some liberal picture-dealer, who has the sense to discern their
merits?'
'Mamma, I should be delighted if you think they COULD be sold; and for anything worth
while.'
'It's worth while trying, however, my dear: do you procure the drawings, and I'll
endeavour to find a purchaser.'

'I wish I could do something,' said I.
'You, Agnes! well, who knows? You draw pretty well, too: if you choose some simple
piece for your subject, I daresay you will be able to produce something we shall all be
proud to exhibit.'
'But I have another scheme in my head, mamma, and have had long, only I did not like to
mention it.'
'Indeed! pray tell us what it is.'
'I should like to be a governess.'
My mother uttered an exclamation of surprise, and laughed. My sister dropped her work
in astonishment, exclaiming, 'YOU a governess, Agnes! What can you be dreaming of?'
'Well! I don't see anything so VERY extraordinary in it. I do not pretend to be able to
instruct great girls; but surely I could teach little ones: and I should like it so much: I am
so fond of children. Do let me, mamma!'
'But, my love, you have not learned to take care of YOURSELF yet: and young children
require more judgment and experience to manage than elder ones.'
'But, mamma, I am above eighteen, and quite able to take care of myself, and others too.
You do not know half the wisdom and prudence I possess, because I have never been
tried.'
'Only think,' said Mary, 'what would you do in a house full of strangers, without me or
mamma to speak and act for you--with a parcel of children, besides yourself, to attend to;
and no one to look to for advice? You would not even know what clothes to put on.'
'You think, because I always do as you bid me, I have no judgment of my own: but only
try me--that is all I ask--and you shall see what I can do.'
At that moment my father entered and the subject of our discussion was explained to him.
'What, my little Agnes a governess!' cried he, and, in spite of his dejection, he laughed at
the idea.
'Yes, papa, don't YOU say anything against it: