A Woman Named Smith | Page 8

an' I drap een de

bushes; it ain't no place fo' sensible niggahs when white folks grab
shot-guns. Doctor see me an' holler: 'Adam! git outer dem bushes, you
ol' fool! You my witness what dis hellion's done to my fowls!'
"Ol' Mis' Scarlett she s'anter ter de winder wid 'er gun sort o' hangin'
loose, an' holler: 'Adam! Come outer dem bushes 'fo' I pickle yo' hide!
You my witness ob dis ruffian trispassin' on my prop'ty an' cussin' an'
seducin' a ol' woman widout 'er consent,' she says. 'Has I retched my
age,' says ol' Mis' Scarlett, 'to have his fowls ruinin' my gyardin', an'
him whut's a dunghill rooster himself flyin' ovah my fences
unbeknownst?'
"'If there evah was a leather-hided ol' hen ripe foh roastin' on
Beelzebub's own griddle, it's you, you gallows ol' witch!' says Doctor,
shakin' 'is fist up at her.
"'Aha! I got a plain case!' says ol' Mis', grim-like. 'I'll have a warrant
out foh you dis day, Geddes, you owdacious villyum!'
"And she done it. Yas'm. An' dey done sont de shariff atter me for
witness, all two bofe o' dem."
"Well, and what did you do?" I asked, curiously. I was getting a
side-light on Great-Aunt Sophronisba.
"Me? I got on muh knees an' wrastled wid de speret," said Uncle Adam.
"I done tuck mah troubles to de Lawd, whichin He _'bleeged_ ter know
I cyant deal wid ol' Mis' Scarlett an' de Doctor. Missis, I prayed!"
"Oh! And what happened then?"
The old man looked around him, cautiously, and lowered his voice:
"Wellum, Mis' Scarlett she tuck an' went an' up an' died. Yessum! She
done daid. An' next thing we-all heah, she 'd went an' lef de Hynds
place to youna, 'stead ob de Doctor, or dat furriner."
"She had Hynds relatives, then? I didn't know."

"Wellum, de Doctor an' ol' Mis' Scarlett wuz cousins. Dat's how come
dey could fight so powerful. Ain't you nevah had no relations to fight
wid, ma'ams?"
We explained, regretfully, that we hadn't.
"Den you ain't nevah knowed, an' you ain't nevah gwine ter knew, whut
real, sho-nough fightin' _is_," said Unc' Adam, with conviction.
"You mentioned a foreigner," hinted Alicia.
The old man shook his head deprecatingly. "Don't seem lak I evah able
to rickermembah dat boy's name, nohow. His grampa' 'uz a Hynds,
likewise his ma, but she 'sisted on marryin' er furriner, an' de boy takes
atter de furriners 'stead er we-all. 'Taint de po' boy's fault, but ol' Mis'
Scarlett hated 'im wuss 'n pizen. De only notice she take er de boy is ter
warrant 'im fo' trispassin'. Dat 's how come folkses ter say--" he paused
suddenly.
"Well, what do folks say?" I wanted to know.
"Well, Missis," he admitted, "dey say it's natchel to fight wid yo' kin
whilst you 're livin', but 'taint natchel ter carry de fight inter de
grave-yahd. Dat's whut she done, ma'ams. An' folks is outdone wid 'er,
whichin' she ain't lef de Hynds place to de Hyndses, but done tuhn it
ovah ter--uh--ah--"
"To a Yankee woman named Smith?"
"Yessum, dat's it."
"Had either the Doctor or the foreigner any real claim or right to this
property, do you know?"
"No, ma'am, we-all 'lows dey ain't got no mo' law-right dan whut you's
got. Ol' Mis' Scarlett ain't _'bleeged_ ter lef it to de Hyndses, but folks
thinks she oughter done it, an' dey's powerful riled 'cause she ain't. Dey
minds dis wuss'n all de warrantin' an' rampagin' an' rucusses she cut up

whilst she wuz wid us."
"I see," said I, thoughtfully.
"Missises," said the old man, anxiously, "you-all ain't meanin' ter stay
hyuh to-night, is you?" He seemed really distressed at the notion.
"Lemme take you-all to de hotel, please, Missises! Don't stay hyuh
to-night!"
"Why not? What's the matter with this house?"
Again he looked around him, stealthily.
"It's h'anted!" said he, desperately. "Missis, listen: I 'uz comin' home
from prayer-meetin', 'bout two weeks ago, walkin' back er dis same
place in de dark ob de moon. An' all ob a suddin I hyuh de pianner in
de pahlor, _ting-a-ling-a-ling! ting-a-ling-a-ling!_ I say, 'Who de name
er Gawd in ol' Mis' Scarlett's pahlor, when dey ain't nobody in it?' I
look thoo de haidge, an' dey's one weenchy light in de room, an' whilst
I'm lookin', it goes out! An' de pianner, she's a-playin' right along!
Yessum, de pianner, she's er tingalingin' by 'erself in de middle o' de
night!"
"And who was playing it, Uncle Adam?"
"Dat's what I axin yit: who playin' Mis' Scarlett's pianner when dey
wasn't nobody in de house?"
"Why didn't you find out?"
"Who, me?" cried the old man, with horror. "If I could er borried a
extra pahr er laigs from er