A Labrador Doctor | Page 9

form boys were lazily cooking and
devouring their suppers. Certain parts of those repasts, like sausages,
we would import ready cooked from the "Tuck Shop," and hence they
only needed warming up. Breakfast in Big School was no comfort to
one, and personally I seldom attended it. But at dinner and tea one had
to appear, and remain till the doors were opened again. It was a kind of
roll-call; and the penalty for being late was fifty lines to be written out.
As my own habits were never as regular as they should have been,
whenever I was able to keep ahead, I possessed pages of such lines,
neatly written out during school hours and ready for emergencies. On

other occasions I somewhat shamefacedly recall that I employed other
boys, who devoted less time to athletics than was my wont, to help me
out--their only remuneration being the "joy of service."
The great desire of every boy who could hope to do so was to excel in
athletics. This fact has much to commend it in such an educational
system, for it undoubtedly kept its devotees from innumerable worse
troubles and dangers. All athletics were compulsory, unless one had
obtained permanent exemption from the medical officer. If one was not
chosen to play on any team during the afternoon, each boy had to go to
gymnasium for drill and exercises, or to "flannel" and run round the
Aylesbury Arms, an old public house three quarters of a mile distant.
Any breach of this law was severely punished by the boys themselves.
It involved a "fives batting," that is, a "birching" carried out with a
hardwood fives bat, after chapel in the presence of the house. As a
breach of patriotism, it carried great disgrace with it, and was very,
very seldom necessary.
Experience would make me a firm believer in
self-government--determination is the popular term now, I believe. No
punishments ever touched the boys one tenth part as much as those
administered by themselves. On one occasion two of the Big School
monitors, who were themselves notorious far more for their constant
breaches of school law than for their observance of it, decided to make
capital at the expense of the sixth form. One day, just as the dinner-bell
rang, they locked the sixth form door, while a conclave was being held
inside. Though everyone was intended to know to whom the credit
belonged, it was understood that no one would dream of giving
evidence against them. But it so happened that their voices had been
recognized from within by one of the sixth form boys--and "bullies"
and unpopular though the culprits were, they wouldn't deny their guilt.
Their condign punishment was to be "fives-batted" publicly in Big
School--in which, however, they regained very considerable popularity
by the way they took a "spanking" without turning a hair, though it cost
no less than a dozen bats before it was over.
The publicity of Big School was the only redemption of such a

bear-garden, but that was a good feature. It served to make us toe the
line. After tea, it was the custom to have what we called "Upper School
Boxing." A big ring was formed, boxing-gloves provided, and any
differences which one might have to settle could be arranged there.
There was more energy than science about the few occasions on which
I appeared personally in the ring, but it was an excellent safety-valve
and quite an evolutionary experience.
The exigency of having to play our games immediately after noon
dinner had naturally taught the boys at the head of athletic affairs that it
was not wise to eat too much. Dinner was the one solid meal which the
college provided, and most of us wanted it badly enough when it came
along, especially the suet puddings which went by the name of
"bollies" and were particularly satisfying. But whenever any game of
importance was scheduled, a remorseless card used to be passed round
the table just after the meat stage, bearing the ominous legend "No
bolly to-day." To make sure that there were no truants, all hands were
forced to "Hooverize." Oddly enough, beer in large blue china jugs was
freely served at every dinner. We called it "swipes," and boys, however
small, helped themselves to as much as they liked. Moreover, as soon
as the game was over, all who had their house colours might come in
and get "swipes" served to them freely through the buttery window.
Both practices, I believe, have long since fortunately fallen into
desuetude.
To encourage the budding athlete there was an excellent custom of
classifying not only the players who attained the first team; but beyond
them there were "the Forty" who wore velvet caps with tassels, "the
Sixty" who wore velvet