A House to Let | Page 5

the spot), "and I request to, hear no more of it."
After that, he conducted himself pretty well. He was always a little
squeezed man, was Jarber, in little sprigged waistcoats; and he had
always little legs and a little smile, and a little voice, and little
round-about ways. As long as I can remember him he was always going
little errands for people, and carrying little gossip. At this present time
when he called me "Sophonisba!" he had a little old-fashioned lodging
in that new neighbourhood of mine. I had not seen him for two or three
years, but I had heard that he still went out with a little
perspective-glass and stood on door-steps in Saint James's Street, to see

the nobility go to Court; and went in his little cloak and goloshes
outside Willis's rooms to see them go to Almack's; and caught the
frightfullest colds, and got himself trodden upon by coachmen and
linkmen, until he went home to his landlady a mass of bruises, and had
to be nursed for a month.
Jarber took off his little fur-collared cloak, and sat down opposite me,
with his little cane and hat in his hand.
"Let us have no more Sophonisbaing, if you please, Jarber," I said.
"Call me Sarah. How do you do? I hope you are pretty well."
"Thank you. And you?" said Jarber.
"I am as well as an old woman can expect to be."
Jarber was beginning:
"Say, not old, Sophon--" but I looked at the candlestick, and he left off;
pretending not to have said anything.
"I am infirm, of course," I said, "and so are you. Let us both be thankful
it's no worse."
"Is it possible that you look worried?" said Jarber.
"It is very possible. I have no doubt it is the fact."
"And what has worried my Soph-, soft-hearted friend," said Jarber.
"Something not easy, I suppose, to comprehend. I am worried to death
by a House to Let, over the way."
Jarber went with his little tip-toe step to the window-curtains, peeped
out, and looked round at me.
"Yes," said I, in answer: "that house."
After peeping out again, Jarber came back to his chair with a tender air,
and asked: "How does it worry you, S-arah?"
"It is a mystery to me," said I. "Of course every house is a mystery,
more or less; but, something that I don't care to mention" (for truly the
Eye was so slight a thing to mention that I was more than half ashamed
of it), "has made that House so mysterious to me, and has so fixed it in
my mind, that I have had no peace for a month. I foresee that I shall
have no peace, either, until Trottle comes to me, next Monday."
I might have mentioned before, that there is a lone-standing jealousy
between Trottle and Jarber; and that there is never any love lost
between those two.
"Trottle," petulantly repeated Jarber, with a little flourish of his cane;
"how is Trottle to restore the lost peace of Sarah?"

"He will exert himself to find out something about the House. I have
fallen into that state about it, that I really must discover by some means
or other, good or bad, fair or foul, how and why it is that that House
remains To Let."
"And why Trottle? Why not," putting his little hat to his heart; "why
not, Jarber?
"To tell you the truth, I have never thought of Jarber in the matter. And
now I do think of Jarber, through your having the kindness to suggest
him--for which I am really and truly obliged to you--I don't think he
could do it."
"Sarah!"
"I think it would be too much for you, Jarber."
"Sarah!"
"There would be coming and going, and fetching and carrying, Jarber,
and you might catch cold."
"Sarah! What can be done by Trottle, can be done by me. I am on terms
of acquaintance with every person of responsibility in this parish. I am
intimate at the Circulating Library. I converse daily with the Assessed
Taxes. I lodge with the Water Rate. I know the Medical Man. I lounge
habitually at the House Agent's. I dine with the Churchwardens. I move
to the Guardians. Trottle! A person in the sphere of a domestic, and
totally unknown to society!"
"Don't be warm, Jarber. In mentioning Trottle, I have naturally relied
on my Right-Hand, who would take any trouble to gratify even a whim
of his old mistress's. But, if you can find out anything to help to unravel
the mystery of this House to Let, I shall be fully as much obliged to you
as if there was never a Trottle in the land."
Jarber rose and put on his little cloak.