A Budget of Paradoxes, Volume I | Page 7

geometry. He put
pencil to paper, drew a circle, and constructed what seemed likely to
answer, and, indeed, was--as he said--certain, if only this bit were equal

to that; which of course it was not. He forwarded his diagram to the
Secretary of the Diffusion Society, to be handed to the author of the
article, in case the difficulty should happen to be therein overcome.
3. Discovery at all hazards, to get on in the world. Thirty years ago, an
officer of rank, just come from foreign service, and trying for a
decoration from the Crown, found that his claims were of doubtful
amount, and was told by a friend that so and so, who had got the order,
had the additional claim of scientific distinction. Now this officer,
while abroad, had bethought himself one day, that there really could be
no difficulty in finding the circumference of a circle: if a circle were
rolled upon a straight line until the undermost point came undermost
again, there would be the straight line equal to the circle. He came to
me, saying that he did not feel equal to the statement of his claim in this
respect, but that if some clever fellow would put the thing in a proper
light, he thought his affair might be managed. I was clever enough to
put the thing in a proper light to himself, to this extent at least, that,
though perhaps they were wrong, the advisers of the Crown would
never put the letters K.C.B. to such a circle as his.
4. The notion that mathematicians cannot find the circle for common
purposes. A working man measured the altitude of a cylinder
accurately, and--I think the process of {11} Archimedes was one of his
proceedings--found its bulk. He then calculated the ratio of the
circumference to the diameter, and found it answered very well on
other modes of trial. His result was about 3.14. He came to London,
and somebody sent him to me. Like many others of his pursuit, he
seemed to have turned the whole force of his mind upon one of his
points, on which alone he would be open to refutation. He had read
some of Kater's experiments, and had got the Act of 1825 on weights
and measures. Say what I would, he had for a long time but one
answer--"Sir! I go upon Captain Kater and the Act of Parliament." But I
fixed him at last. I happened to have on the table a proof-sheet of the
Astronomical Memoirs, in which were a large number of observed
places of the planets compared with prediction, and asked him whether
it could be possible that persons who did not know the circle better than
he had found it could make the calculations, of which I gave him a

notion, so accurately? He was perfectly astonished, and took the titles
of some books which he said he would read.
5. Application for the reward from abroad. Many years ago, about
twenty-eight, I think, a Jesuit came from South America, with a
quadrature, and a cutting from a newspaper announcing that a reward
was ready for the discovery in England. On this evidence he came over.
After satisfying him that nothing had ever been offered here, I
discussed his quadrature, which was of no use. I succeeded better when
I told him of Richard White, also a Jesuit, and author of a quadrature
published before 1648, under the name of Chrysæspis, of which I can
give no account, having never seen it. This White (Albius) is the only
quadrator who was ever convinced of his error. My Jesuit was struck by
the instance, and promised to read more geometry--he was no
Clavius--before he published his book. He relapsed, however, for I saw
his book advertised in a few days. I may say, as sufficient proof of my
being no collector, that I had not the curiosity to buy his book; and my
friend the {12} Jesuit did not send me a copy, which he ought to have
done, after the hour I had given him.
6. Application for the reward at home. An agricultural laborer squared
the circle, and brought the proceeds to London. He left his papers with
me, one of which was the copy of a letter to the Lord Chancellor,
desiring his Lordship to hand over forthwith 100,000 pounds, the
amount of the alleged offer of reward. He did not go quite so far as M.
de Vausenville, who, I think in 1778, brought an action against the
Academy of Sciences to recover a reward to which he held himself
entitled. I returned the papers, with a note, stating that he had not the
knowledge requisite to see in what the problem consisted. I got for
answer a letter