A Book of Nonsense | Page 2

of Leeds.
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There was an Old Person of Cadiz,?Who was always polite to all ladies;?But in handing his daughter, he fell into the water,?Which drowned that Old Person of Cadiz.
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There was an Old Man of the Isles,?Whose face was pervaded with smiles;?He sang "High dum diddle," and played on the fiddle,?That amiable Man of the Isles.
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There was an Old Person of Basing,?Whose presence of mind was amazing;?He purchased a steed, which he rode at full speed,?And escaped from the people of Basing.
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There was an Old Man who supposed?That the street door was partially closed;?But some very large Rats ate his coats and his hats,?While that futile Old Gentleman dozed.
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There was an Old Person whose habits?Induced him to feed upon Rabbits;?When he'd eaten eighteen, he turned perfectly green,?Upon which he relinquished those habits.
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There was an Old Man of the West,?Who wore a pale plum-colored vest;?When they said, "Does it fit?" he replied, "Not a bit!" That uneasy Old Man of the West.
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There was an Old Man of Marseilles,?Whose daughters wore bottle-green veils:?They caught several Fish, which they put in a dish,?And sent to their Pa at Marseilles.
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There was an Old Man of the Wrekin,?Whose shoes made a horrible creaking;?But they said, "Tell us whether your shoes are of leather, Or of what, you Old Man of the Wrekin?"
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There was a Young Lady whose nose?Was so long that it reached to her toes;?So she hired an Old Lady, whose conduct was steady,?To carry that wonderful nose.
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There was a Young Lady of Norway,?Who casually sat in a doorway;?When the door squeezed her flat, she exclaimed, "What of that?" This courageous Young Lady of Norway.
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There was an Old Man of Apulia,?Whose conduct was very peculiar;?He fed twenty sons upon nothing but buns,?That whimsical Man of Apulia.
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There was an Old Man of Quebec,--?A beetle ran over his neck;?But he cried, "With a needle I'll slay you, O beadle!"?That angry Old Man of Quebec.
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There was a Young Lady of Bute,?Who played on a silver-gilt flute;?She played several jigs to her Uncle's white Pigs:?That amusing Young Lady of Bute.
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There was an Old Person of Philoe,?Whose conduct was scroobious and wily;?He rushed up a Palm when the weather was calm,?And observed all the ruins of Philoe.
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There was an Old Man with a poker,?Who painted his face with red ochre.?When they said, "You 're a Guy!" he made no reply,?But knocked them all down with his poker.
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There was an Old Person of Prague,?Who was suddenly seized with the plague;?But they gave him some butter, which caused him to mutter, And cured that Old Person of Prague.
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There was an Old Man of Peru,?Who watched his wife making a stew;?But once, by mistake, in a stove she did bake?That unfortunate Man of Peru.
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There was an Old Man of the North,?Who fell into a basin of broth;?But a laudable cook fished him out with a hook,?Which saved that Old Man of the North.
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There was an Old Person of Troy,?Whose drink was warm brandy and soy,?Which he took with a spoon, by the light of the moon,?In sight of the city of Troy.
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There was an Old Person of Mold,?Who shrank from sensations of cold;?So he purchased some muffs, some furs, and some fluffs, And wrapped himself well from the cold.
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There was an Old Person of Tring,?Who embellished his nose with a ring;?He gazed at the moon every evening in June,?That ecstatic Old Person of Tring.
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There was an Old Man of Nepaul,?From his horse had a terrible fall;?But, though split quite in two, with some very strong glue They mended that man of Nepaul.
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There was an Old Man of the Nile,?Who sharpened his nails with a file,?Till he cut off his thumbs, and said calmly, "This comes Of sharpening one's nails with a file!"
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There was an Old Man of th' Abruzzi,?So blind that he couldn't his foot see;?When they said, "That's your toe," he replied, "Is it so?" That doubtful Old Man of th' Abruzzi.
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There was an Old Man of Calcutta,?Who perpetually ate bread and butter;?Till a great bit of muffin, on which he was stuffing,?Choked that horrid Old Man of Calcutta.
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There was an Old Person of Rhodes,?Who strongly objected to toads;?He paid several cousins to catch them by dozens,?That futile Old Person of Rhodes.
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There was an Old Man of the South,?Who had an immoderate mouth;?But in swallowing a dish that was quite full of Fish,?He was choked, that Old Man of the South.
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There was an Old Man of Melrose,?Who walked on the tips of his toes;?But they said, "It ain't pleasant to see you at present, You stupid Old Man of Melrose."
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There was an Old Man of the Dee,?Who was sadly annoyed by a Flea;?When he said, "I will scratch it!" they gave him a hatchet, Which grieved that Old Man of the Dee.
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There was a Young Lady of Lucca,?Whose lovers completely forsook her;?She